The End of the Beginning

It is time to admit something -- I'm not nearly finished on the fiction project.

This is a big deal for me to say, because in October 2009 I proudly typed "the end" and announced that I was ready to send it to an agent. The agent said that she would still take a look at it, so I formatted away and hit "send." And then I waited.

(Now, please note, I didn't use this time to just paint my nails and take up woodworking. I was still writing a slew of freelance magazine and newspaper articles, moving, and, well, trying NOT to think about the fiction project.) I didn't open the file again, I didn't try to tweak characters or improve plot lines, I simply let it sit, as it was FINISHED.

Boy was I wrong.

You know what happens next, right? That's right. The agent passed on the project, a few months ago after reading the full manuscript, and I still waited. I looked for other agencies, sent other queries, anything except open that file.

But over the past few weeks, instead of dreading the file, I started to miss my characters. And I started to think about the writing itself, that maybe in my work I had tried so hard to write a subtly nuanced story that I nuanced myself out of much of the story. There was a lot more there to explore that I had left untouched. I realized that that October day was just the end of the beginning.

I am thankful, thankful that the agent took so long to respond, thankful that I am not abandoning the project, and thankful that at least the beginning of the next stage is finally illuminated.

So the file is opened. The quintessential red pen is out and I am happy to visit the setting and see my characters again. If I want to read it again, maybe someone else will too.